7.14.2008

Oscar-Worthy

I am entering my father's house, and my brother is there, ambling from the computer den to the kitchen. I meet him halfway, in the hallway, and he flashes me a smile as well as the cover of a DVD I don't recognize. "I saw your movie," he says matter-of-factly.

"What?" I don't remember what 'my movie' is.

Albert pushes the DVD out towards me. On the front cover I see that it is directed by Amnon Buchbinder, a Canadian writer/director who taught a workshop I attended back in February. The title is unfamiliar and not very appealing anyways. It doesn't really look like my kind of movie. Albert takes it, turns it over, and puts it back in my hand so I am reading the back cover. He points at the bottom, where it clearly reads, "Screenplay by: Edna Chan."

"Huh," I say, mostly to myself.

We descend into the basement, where a 52" projector screen awaits my undoubtedly Oscar-worthy movie. Popping the DVD in, it somehow makes sense that Amnon Buchbinder would use one of my screenplays. He did take about three pieces after the workshop and not tell me why. I can very dimly recall what the screenplays I wrote were about, but no details come to mind. I can't even think of a character name. All I remember was something to do with placenta.

As we watch the movie, I realize that I don't remember much of this so-called screenplay of mine whatsoever. My brother laughs a lot and gives me funny looks throughout the film. I understand why, as I see red-saturated images of peasants gathering wheat, and feeding a vegetarian clone of Audrey II from Little Shop of Horrors. Then a group of little people dances around in a circle outside a 1800's storefront. Did I really write this? It's awful.

I awake to find that I am frowning. I look around my room from the safety of my bed, and it takes a long moment before I am able to shake the chills that have taken over my body.

3 comments:

Kenny said...

What? That was a dream? Weirdness. You must take pride in making good art.

Almost beats my dream last night about fist-fighting a fat man in a pink bunny suit on top of the lockers of a men's gym room. I really don't know what that means. Maybe I should be worried.

Anonymous said...

Good twist Edna. I didn't really see it coming. Think of twists that don't involve "waking up from a dream" or "coming out of anaethesia"... that sort of thing. You are SO clever. Keep thinking. It's what you're good at! I love this blog.

Anonymous said...

I thought this was real until the very last moment. Maybe it's because I too met amnon and know his misterious ways. There are trucks everywhere here that have "buchbinder" written in huge letters on their sides. It creeps the hell out of me everytime one goes by. I half expect an army of buchbinders to hop out of the back and arrest me for bad character development.